Cats who teach me to fly…

Kelly, Bento and Mr Slow were all from my feeding area at Whampoa. Kelly left on 2 Nov last year. The LTCI did not work on her or perhaps it was too late. She was cremated on the same day.

Bento appeared 2 to 3 years ago. We noticed that he lost a lot of weight and we decided to bring him home. It was early this year. He was suffering from kidney failure. He got along well with other cats. We tried our best to make him comfortable. He loved sitting on a high wall bed. We will let him be wherever he was comfortable. Bento left on 27 April. I remember on that early morning, while I was still sleeping, his image flashed in my mind and I thought to myself, Bento must have left us. Shortly, Mel informed me that he has left.

I remember when I first saw him in 2013, he was sitting on top of a motor bike. I told Mel that this cat was a female, Mr Slow immediately roared at me with disagreement and we both broke into laughter.

The reason why we named him Mr Slow was he was always the last one to finish his food. He eats slowly and walks slowly. Everything about his actions were slow. Sometimes I called him Slow Slow…and he responded to it.

Mr Slow went missing twice. The first one was for more than three months which I believed someone had took him in and released him again and I think I know who…

The second time he was relocated by someone for more than a month. A neighbour spotted him, informed me and I brought him back. In just one to two weeks time, Mr Slow has lost so much weight and with covid 19, many vet clinics were not opened for consultation. By looking at Mr Slow’s conditions, we believe that he has kidney issue. We gave him sub-cut fluid and all the supplements that we usually give to our kidney disease cats. After two days of fluid, he seemed to look better and started to eat.

Sadly, it didn’t last long. He was with us for less than two weeks. I found him breathing heavily yesterday and sent him to the clinic. He was diagnosed with end stage kidney failure. Our vet tried her best. Mr Slow left us this morning.

All my community cats are getting old. They were already adults when I started to feed them seven years ago. Therefore, many whom I am still feeding are more than 10 years of age and I am prepared for what is coming. I want to take care of them when they fall sick until the end of time…

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The first incident started with not being able to kill the truth, they assassinated my character instead so they were able to bypass me to persuade the owner to sign the contract and make themselves the rightful owner of the dogs and left me with humiliation and shame.

Second was the accusation from my adopters, as I have taken the cat away from them due to the breach of contract. Three clauses were breached. What’s more was there to say or even to defend?

Both incidents were all over the social media with more than a hundred comments criticising and calling me names. The feeling was dead awful.

Third, the accusation of being called “fake” coming from my relative that completely burnt me out and left me right at the bottom!

And lastly, the disagreement between my spiritual mentor and I had further pushed me down again…All negative karma ripened at the same time. Wonderful! I have exhausted them. Brilliant! With an heavy heart, I came to India for the Buddha…

Varanasi was my first destination. When I was reading the sutras, Buddha often mentioned the grains of sand along the Ganges river and finally, I was at the Ganges River.

I also caught the beautiful sunrise at the Ganges River.

I saw where the cremation activities were. I saw the beggars, the old, the monks but not the sick and the dead. It wasn’t a pleasant sight despite being the era today, let alone the era during the time of the Buddha. Now I understood why Buddha was so persistent in seeking the truth. Next destination was Sarnath where Buddha delivered his first sermon.

I was visualising Buddha sitting and giving his first teachings to his five disciples.

Bodh Gaya seemed to be rather happening. The place is safe for tourists and I can’t wait to visit the maha temple.

I was overwhelmed when I reached Bodh Gaya that I forgot to take photos. Photos were not allowed unless you use a camera and I no longer carry a camera anymore.

So this was the Bodhi tree that Buddha sat under and got enlightened. I made a vow to the Buddha that I will learn his teachings only from him life after life. And I would create a cause for my vow to come true. Not only mine, but those too who are close to me.

I got up at 4am the next morning and went to Maha temple again to make a full prostration continuously to the Buddha for nearly 30mins. I had to leave when the monks and or nuns began chanting very loudly and with the lighting up of incense and its heavy smell… It still makes me wonder, do we still find peace within ourselves?

In the pali canon text, Buddha always talked about the four Jhana. Where has any of the Jhana gone to? Perhaps meditation should not be practised in “public” places like pilgrimage sites? To be honest, I am very confused with the teachings from the modern monks and nuns. This explains the vows that I made to the Buddha…

Feeling a little sad when I was at Kushinagar looking at the “sleeping” Buddha. I believe many were sad at that point of time when Buddha entered mahaparinirvana.

I sat quietly by the side and out of a sudden a monk was chanting very loudly and I hope not only his wish to liberate himself from samsara would be fulfilled and also those who had the same thought.

And the final destination is the Buddha’s birth place, Lumbini.

No photos are allowed to be taken at the spot where Buddha was born.

The pond on the picture above was where Buddha’s mother took her bath.

I can’t imagine how was the place like 2500 years ago. The grass may be fresher, brighter or greener? The air was fresher? Or the stars were brighter?

Being able to go back to the time where Buddha had been there was an amazement to me. Continually visualising how Buddha took months to travel from one destination to another by foot. What happened along the way? Where did he rest? How did he cope? Etc… We are for sure unable to find another person like the Buddha now till the arrival of Boddhisattva Maitreya. Meantime, the Buddha, pali canon and me!

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Somebody dropped Kelly and her brother at my feeding area five years ago. They were six months old at that time. I had them sterilised and released them. The person who brought them to my feeding area told me that she took pity on the cats so she brought them over to me and I can feed them. Upon hearing it, I felt like killing her at that point of time.

Kelly, 5 years old now, is diagnosed with FeLV positive. She didn’t behave like herself during the past month and started to walk wobbly. She is weak on her hind legs. Kelly loves to sleep in the middle of a parking lot and I don’t know how she is going to survive in such conditions.

Steroid was given to her for the past 5 days and she didn’t seem to get better. Her red blood counts are low. A classic symptom of FeLV cats. There is only one and last option left for me. That is to try her on Lymphocyte T-Cell Immunomodulator(LTCI) injection. I just sent her to the vet for the first jab. I just hope that she survive through each and every jab till she gets well…

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Someone told me F7 did a posting on the dogs as well.

I went and take a look. People gave me all kinds of names, accusing me and slamming me hard. Thanks to the Buddha’s teaching as it did not affect me at all. Actually, all I want was to answer all their questions. I waited for half a day and there were no questions from the new keyboard warriors.

During this period of battling. Mxxxx has given me a lot of support. I didn’t tell a complete story because there are names that I need to protect. Everybody said it was my ego, no, I put the reputation of others first. I am glad that not many has spoken up for me as I don’t want anyone to be slammed as well. Go alone, fight alone and walk out alone.

After reading F7 post, I happen to realise that I actually protected so many people unknowingly. And the bond of those who quietly supported me grew stronger. What was there to win or lose?

The Buddha’s teaching has always remain and never leaves my mind. Each and everytime, when things appears tough, I questioned myself, did I keep my precepts? Did I live up to the Buddha’s teaching? The path is definitely tough. Everything goes away after a big cry, faith remains, everything remains untouched and unmoved.

I remember there is a Sutra that says something like one must see a danger even in a slightest fault. I can never forget this cos I understand how slightest fault(seed) can grow into an unwholesome tree.

Mel said this to me in the evening, “the maras are here when you have set your mind to further your learning”. I was laughing at her.

“Like a tiny drop of dew, or a bubble floating in a stream; Like a flash of lightning in a summer cloud, Or a flickering lamp, an illusion, a phantom, or a dream.

So is all conditioned to be seen.”

~ The Buddha from The Diamond Sutra

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We estimated Carl to be above 15 years of age and we are not surprised if he was 20.

Carl was a strong boy. At this age, he was able to jump high and even all the way up to the fridge. I should say he didn’t suffer much. He had all his favourite food spread around him. His favourite dish were fried or boiled fish. No matter how tight our schedule were, we would find time to cook for him.

Carl at his peak! The day we brought him home, he already had two teeth left. Carl took quite some time to adjust himself at home. Carl was not a trouble maker. An extremely good and calm boy. Whenever a family member left, something is always missing “physically “. However, they are always in my head. We cremated Boy and Carl on the same day.

I texted AVS officer a week after Boy was sent for post-mortem. Officer said Boy was still on queue and nothing had been done yet. According to Mel, the officer told her that there was no camera around the scene where Boy was killed. So why was AVS still holding Boy for. We arranged the cremation company to pick Boy up and both Carl and Boy were cremated on the same day.

I was glad that nothing had been done to Boy and I was still able to see him in one piece. I did whatever I did for Carl and many to Boy. Not leaving a single thing out. In hope to create a cause for a favourable rebirth.

It was quite a hectic month for me with so many things happening at one go. Quite a challenge to me and I am glad that my mind stay clear.

The next challenge is another rescue who got hit by a taxi last week and had his jaw dislcoated. Surgery has been scheduled on this Tuesday…

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