Cats who teach me to fly…

Nagar is in the hospital now. We rescued her from under a container in year 2018. She couldn’t move her hind legs. We had the trapper to send her to the vet. Nothing much can be done from the clinic. Our only choice was to send her for acupuncture. Nagar went through many months of acupuncture. She was unable to urine by herself. I had to express her bladder twice a day in order to help her urine. Until one day her urine started to leak by itself and I could not express her bladder anymore.

The vet suggested that we send her for physiotherapy. We did 5 sessions of physiotherapy which cost 1.2k and that was all we can give. We didn’t see much improvement but we still carried on with the acupuncture.

After months of acupuncture, Nagar is able to walk a little. She is able to stand straight by herself. However, she can never walk the same again. She moves very slowly step by step and falls in just a few steps. We are contented with the result and do not expect more. Nagar has done well!

More than 2 weeks ago, we sent Nagar for a check up and a stone measured 1cm was found in her bladder. The vet did a surgery and remove the stone. It must be painful for Nagar.

Since the day Nagar was discharged, she had not been eating well. We didn’t feel good about it so I sent her to the vet yesterday and she was hospitalised.

We visited Nagar an hour ago. She looks better, cheerful and talkative and I really hope she can be discharged tomorrow. The bill can go pretty high if she continues to stay.

Look at the food that the clinic served… She has been served more than what we give.

With Nagar’s condition, I am worried that I may not be able to take care of her to the vet’s expectation.

Currently, I clean and change her pee pad twice a day. Give her supplements she requires. The problem is, if the vet insist that I express her bladder, I would do so but I am not confident that it will be successful because her urine keeps leaking and her bladder is usually empty. The vet said she did it but I didn’t see it!

No matter what, I will do my best to make Nagar as comfortable as possible.

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It definitely going to be a part 3, 4 and so on… and I am not going to name it this way next time:).

Extremely hot weather today. Got all the cats taken care of before heading out.

They have vegan cakes today that tasted so much like a coconut cake :)). I ate it all anyway.

I browsed their books again and I can’t find one that I want. I am not sure what I am looking for actually:). When I look at the chinese characters, my head began to spin and it is not written in simplified chinese. Anyway… I don’t think I will find a good book as it wasn’t taught by the Buddha. The chinese mahayana buddhism used teachings based on chinese cultures. I am so used to reading the pali canon. Soon I will start the Madkyama Agama sutra. Hopefully…

The shorter version of Amitabha sutra is enough to understand the Pureland. That’s what Venerable Wuling would advise and I completely agree with her:)!

Same seat. This is the only seat I like. Lots of privacy and “mind my own business”.

Why am I here today this time? Reading again of course! I am looking at how I can use Autodesk Maya combine with other software like Adobe Premiere Pro, Photoshop, Audition etc… to create an animation. Yes! I am starting a personal project. It’s call the Pureland project! It is getting me all excited and busy and I am loving it!

I am just hoping everything goes smoothly. 2 years the most to complete please. Therefore, a lot of hard work!

Yes, it’s time to feed the cats at Sembawang. Giving without expectation? No…I am giving the cats with expectation. When the conditions are right, they will have to pay me back by practising the dharma. That’s the deal!

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We took him in October last year as he wasn’t eating. It didn’t seem to help him much even though we had his teeth cleaned up and extracted the decayed ones. Shine was FIV positive. He was such a good boy and just like Benjo, all he wanted was food.

He loved milk. He was served with a bowl of milk everyday. How I wish I can serve him a little longer…

Shine passed on peacefully. I was there to chant and meditate for him. This is how little we can help other living beings and it is always never enough.

I usually do not post picture like this. Rainbow cremation has improved their service so much. They have Amituofo chanting playing behind. The staff treated the animals respectfully. They are humble and I love to engage their service. A final goodbye to Shine.

We will meet again for sure!

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I am at Jingsi, Yishun. Taking a seat with a perfect view.

Why am I here today? I like the ambience, tea, the staff and all the wonderful books.

The main reason that I am here is to think about the spiritual cultivation I had been going through lately… They are all good. Meditation is good. Chanting is good. The initial intention of helping the animals and humans stay firm. Be it be in action, chanting or meditation, they work pretty well for me.

Experiencing nimitta is good. I am able to recognise a bright mind, a delusive mind and a sleeping mind. I am able to experience heaven, tranquility and finally equanimity. I am able to better accept the nature of animals, the nature of individual. To better accept sufferings and impermanence. To be able to understand the Buddha’s teachings directly is so precious to me. Because…all these do not happen overnight. These are many lifetimes of cultivation. Would anyone be willing to give up?

Chanting is good because I am able to rely on the chanting of the Buddha’s name to calm my mind anytime and anywhere.

I have always love helping the weak, frail and the voiceless. It becomes natural, part of me. It is the best thing to do in life. An action that I have no fear when facing judgment. That’s what keeping me tall.

Feeling hungry suddenly!

Wonder if this biscuit contains milk or egg. It is safer not to eat!:) Vegan for life!

Arahat and Bodhisattva path are both different path. Can anyone walk both path at the same time? Probably not! The bodhisattva path would be easier if I didn’t experience the awakened mind.

There is an ant crawling around. On my mobile, paper and table. Maybe it is saying “take the bodhisattva path, the animals need help..”!

The monastic seems disagreeable with helping animals but I have big dreams for them. Really big dreams!

A sudden burst of happiness arise. Guess this is how having big dreams feels like!:)

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5 adults and 15 kittens. We bailed 3 adults and 6 kittens from AVS on February 2016 and one of them was Macaron. We managed to trapped 2 heavily pregnant cats before both were sent to AVS and both gave birth to 9 kittens which makes a total of 20 rescues all at the same time.

It was my toughest time. Since then, everything seems easy. Macaron was the last adult who passed on. Out of 15 kittens, only 4 adopted, 7 didn’t make it and 4 with us.

So this is their destiny. All were not even 6 years of age.

What have we provided them? A home, friends, food, water and medical care. All of them were so fearful that they did not allow us to come near them. They kept running away. But we love them!

During this period of time, they weren’t as fearful as they were on the street. They were carefree. They do not have to kill or steal for food. They were not threatened by those who dislike them. They do not have to hide everywhere to be away from humans. They were not invested by fleas, ticks or even maggots. They were not abused by others. They were safe from vehicles, the sun and rain. These were the little things we gave them and yet I still feel I have not given enough. That’s the unsatisfactory of a caregiver.

The more painful I feel, the more I want to perfect the Dharma and stay on to help.

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