Cats who teach me to fly…

To me, it was a sudden death.

Specky was rescued from a school. The school intended to trap the cats around the area and Specky was the last cat that we trapped and was the toughest to trap. We had to engage a trapper.

Specky was with us since Jan 2019.

I sent her to the vet 2 days ago. She was diagnosed with jaundice. Vet took an xray and ran a blood test for her. Her liver wasn’t doing well and vet suspected she may have asthma. She had to be hospitalized and I was told by the vet that Specky would have to stay for a couple of days and see how the antibiotics work on her liver before we proceed to do an ultrasound. I agreed. And the next morning, bad news came it. It was unbelievable. I broke down… I was overwhelmed with guilt and regrets. I should have this and I should have that…

Specky was a feral cat. She was always hissing at me. Until one day she was convinced by me that I am here to love her and not harm her. She started to rub her head against me and waited for me every morning to pet her.

I didn’t see her face on Wednesday morning and I panicked. True indeed, she was ill and if only I had noticed earlier…

I missed Specky so much. After she died, blood flew from her nose and eyes. I didn’t like that and I believe she was given an incorrect treatment.

I called the clinic and told the nurse about it and would like them to be aware of the treatment given to Specky so as to avoid future mistakes. I also asked the vet to quietly and sincerely apologise to Specky. Even though I knew they wouldn’t.

All looked positive on the day I brought her to the clinic and negative when I picked her up. I was told by the vet that I sent her too late and Specky had lungs issue this and that. I didn’t argue. I didn’t want to and found it pointless.

Specky didn’t lose weight. Her fur and coat was perfect. At most, she was only 3-years-old.

Getting angry or blaming anyone wouldn’t do any good. What happened to Specky was unexpected. I will have to be more alert with the rest of my cats. Hoping it will not happen again.

Speck has a daughter. She is Tara.

Tara still doesn’t allow me to go near and she is still hissing at me. I will do what I did to Specky by showing that I love and care for her. Hopefully, she would become her mother, open her heart and love others.

To help Specky open her heart to love is the most valuable thing I can give her and I hope she will continue to love in her next life.

Whenever I see a black cat, that’s Specky and every Specky I see, I see a Miemi.