When he left, Citta was fully conscious, unlike what the vets had said that he was brain dead. Citta was aware of his surroundings. He was aware of me, Mel and all the cats, sound and movement. He didnt die of seizure….
Citta was a brave boy! He fought and fought, one battle after another, never giving up. I call him my Buddha Boy cos of his persistence to live. With such persistence, he will and can become a Buddha one day and I strongly believe he would cos I have never come across a cat or even a human being like him.
How much I wish I can still hold him in my arms, to shower him with my love.
No matter how hard we tried, we couldn’t defeat nature. We couldn’t defeat karma. But we could give him our love, attention, dedicate merits to him etc…
So what has my Buddha boy, Citta taught me? There will bound to be changes in my life… And it will always be for the better good.
Nothing stays permanent. Not miemi, not Citta, neither can I!
We have arranged a private cremation for Citta. Mel has helped alot. So much so that by saying thank you to her is not enough. That is why when I dedicate merits every time, she would be the first person I call out.
I took lots of videos on Citta. The way he walked, the way he twisted his backside and the happy moments of him. His departure further shows me the reality of samsara. It hurts… despite the fact that I have fully understood emptiness. I still wish I could still wake up in the middle of the night to watch him, feed him, sleep beside him and take care of him… and right now, I have to get used to live with life without my beloved cats as they depart, just like Citta, again and again and again…
Cats who teach me to fly... 
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